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Post the Jokes

+3
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Post by vasu_g0 Sat May 10, 2008 8:54 pm

You can put your jokes here.. Laughing Laughing Laughing
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Post the Jokes Empty Good topic

Post by hjpotter92 Sun May 11, 2008 1:28 pm

What you created is a good topic. I hope that other users post here freely. sunny
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Post by vasu_g0 Mon May 12, 2008 5:21 pm

Late one night, a mugger wearing a ski mask jumped into the path of a well-dressed man and stuck a gun in his ribs. "Give me your money," he demanded.

Indignant, the affluent man replied, "You can't do this-I'm a politician!"

"In that case," replied the robber, "give me my money!"

:lol!:
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Post by Gokuh Mon May 12, 2008 5:44 pm

Vasu that was a very good Joke, I am flooded with thousands of jokes that I will releases one by one. here is one of it.

How did dracula fall in love with his wife?

ANS:- Love at first Bite.
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Post by hjpotter92 Mon May 12, 2008 10:23 pm

Nice jokes. Why the other three users are not posting here?? What has happened to them? One more joke from me:

Boy[To his mother]: I have decided to stop studying

Mother: Why????

Boy: Because I heard that a man was shot dead because he knew too much

P.S. I know that there shouldn't be anything out of this topic but I was unable to resist the fact that the other users are not visiting this place.
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Post by vasu_g0 Tue May 13, 2008 4:23 pm

Teacher:'Mavis,can you tell me which month is shortest?'
Mavis:It's' May' miss..
Teacher:'No, it isn't. it's february.
Mavis:But miss february has 8 letters in it while May has 3 letters.... Very Happy
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Post by deeptanshu Wed May 14, 2008 11:04 pm

Banke-Yesterday Mohan`s Father fall in a well,his father got injuredand he was shouting.
Radhe-So how he is now.
Banke-He will be allright,no voice was heard from yesterday. Very Happy Laughing
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Post by deeptanshu Wed May 14, 2008 11:14 pm

CUSTOMER-WAITER HERE IS A DEAD FLY IN MY SOUP.
WAITER-MIGHTBE THIS FLY,TASTED THIS SOUP AND THEN GOT DEAD.I WILL JUST GO TO THE COOK AND TELL HIM ABOUT YOUR COMPLAINT THAT THE SOUP WAS NOT ALRIGHT.
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Post by deeptanshu Wed May 14, 2008 11:42 pm

Suffering from ear pain Banke goes to doctor and told his problem.
Doctor said : If you knew that a lizard has entered in your ear than why you tolerated this pain silently.
Banke: Firstly a cockroach had entered in my ear, I thought a lizard would caught him.










. :lol!: :lol!: :lol!: flower :lol!: afro :lol!:
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Post by hjpotter92 Thu May 15, 2008 11:24 am

Dear deepu.garima This is your first time so no problem. but be careful thet you don't double post. Try to post all your jokes in only one post.
Thanks

Now, Some selected jokes:

A teacher had just moved house with all her possessions including box and box of books.
As the van driver put down the last box in her second-floor-flat, he grumbled, “For heaven’s sake, lady, why didn’t you read them before you came?”

Customer: “Why are the signs in your window so full of spelling and grammatical mistakes?”
Storekeeper: “So that people will think I’m a full and come in expecting to get the best of me. Since I put up those signs, business has boomed.”
“Why do they call the language we speak our mother-tongue?” asked the son.
“Because fathers so seldom get a chance to use it,” replied his father.
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Post by vasu_g0 Fri May 16, 2008 2:28 pm

“What is your age?” asked the judge. “Remember you are under oath.”

“Twenty-one years and some months,” The woman answered.

“How many months?” the judge persisted.

“One hundred and eight.”
 
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Post by hjpotter92 Sat May 17, 2008 4:02 pm

A man walked into pet shop and asked about 547 beetles, 96 rats and about 6500 cockroaches.

'I am sorry sir but we only supply rats. But why do you want all the creatures for?' asked the shop-owner.

"I was thrown out of my flat this morning," repliedthe man. "And my landlord says I must leave it exactly as I found it."

The Police car siren blistering raced in front of aspeeding car and forced the driver to stop.

A heavily built policeman walked out and said,"Your name! please." taking out his notebook and pen.

'Certainly officer.' replied the driver. "It's Horatio Albus Xavier Idomeneus Slughorn Sybill Aeneas Iphicles Memnon Tyndareous Hylas."

The police man thought for some time looked at his note-book shook his head and then said,"I'll just give you a warning this time -- don't break the sped limit again.
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Post by Gokuh Sat May 17, 2008 4:03 pm

These all are nice jokes. I love them all. I think you all have a factory of it. Never mind. I am the owner of that all factories.he he he he he he he
Deepu plz post all you jokes in one post. Or wait other to post. Never post continuesly. Now its my turn:-

WHAT will we call a computer superhero?
Ans:- Screen Saver.
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Post by garima Sun May 18, 2008 12:29 pm

Teacher- Why does the statue of liberty stand in New York harbour?
Pupil-Because it can't sit down!
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Post by hjpotter92 Sun May 18, 2008 1:03 pm

It was really a nice joke Garima. Razz:P

Now, one from my side.
Williams: My son is really nice.
Elsa: Does he drink or smoke?
Williams: No, he never does.
Elsa: Does he come late to home?
Williams : No.
Elsa: Then he really is nice. By the way, what his age is?
Willams: He will be six months next week.
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Post by garima Tue May 20, 2008 4:11 pm

Santa:What's ford?
Banta:Gaddi.
Santa:What's oxford?
Banta:Very simple bail gaddi.


Patient Santa : D..D...Doctor my problem is that everyone neglect me...
Doctor : Next!


Last edited by Admin on Thu May 22, 2008 4:14 pm; edited 1 time in total (Reason for editing : You shouldn,t oduble post)
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Post by hjpotter92 Thu May 22, 2008 4:40 pm

A joke from this place of India.


Proud mother (Showing her son to her friend):Doesn't he look like his father???
Friend: Don't worry, he will probably change for the good as he gets older.
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Post by garima Sun May 25, 2008 3:47 pm

Teacher: Tell me students! What is that word which is used the most.
Student: Sir, I don't know!
Teacher:Very Good...Sit down.

Razz:P:P:P:P:P
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Post by deeptanshu Sun May 25, 2008 3:51 pm

Santa: Why does Sun rise in the East???
Banta: Oh!!! What an easy questions...Even a fool can answer it.
Santa: That's why I asked you about it.

Laughing Razz   Very Happy    Razz
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Post by hjpotter92 Mon May 26, 2008 7:30 pm

Nice jokes there, really funny. Now, one more over this much of laughing:

“Get Up”, shouted Albert’s mother. “You’ll be late for the school.”
“But I don’t want to go there,” protested Albert. “All the kids are terrible, teachers are horrible, and it’s all extremely boring. I want to stay home.”
“But,” replied Albert’s mother. “You’re forty-three & the headmaster of your school.”

I hope one won't die laughing. Laughing :lol!:

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Post by garima Tue May 27, 2008 3:27 pm

Chemistry teacher said to his crying wife .
Teacher : Your crying will not effect me . Tears are what? just some phosphorous, salt, a little bit sodium cloride and left water.       Very Happy Razz                                                                             
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Post by vasu_g0 Tue May 27, 2008 5:55 pm

Teacher: What will you say when an eagle is ill
Student: illeagle Very Happy
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Post by hjpotter92 Tue May 27, 2008 8:52 pm

A nice joke Vasundhara..Really fascinating. Now one more

The frantic-looking lady came rushing out of her house into the street & cried :"Help Exclamation Help Exclamation My young son has swallowed a coin & is chocking. I don't know what to do Question"

Everyone looked the other way, except for a middle-aged gentleman who rushed into the lady's house, found her young son, turned him upside down and shook him until the coin fell out of his mouth.


"Oh, thank you Exclamation" cried the lady. "Are you a doctor?"


"No madam," replied the middle-aged man. "I'm from the Income Tax Department"
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Post by vasu_g0 Wed May 28, 2008 12:36 pm

Nice joke Admin.. it was very funny ..i think every one has a nice joke now one joke from me..


Wife: Darling do you think we should go out for dinner?
Husband: Ohhh! yes, I am bored now from washing the plates.

Wink Wink Wink tongue tongue bounce bounce bounce
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Post by hjpotter92 Thu May 29, 2008 1:56 pm

Great and funny joke.
Que.Where you can always see happiness?
Ans.In a dictionary
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